Team Meeting Satirist T-Shirts

Great coaching is about knowing how to give and when to play feedback...

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

I'm looking for employees who have their own unique way of seeing things my way.

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."

"If nothing else needs welding, Paula, I'm going to lunch."

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

"Now that I have everyone's attention..."

"I realize we had to liquidate some assets, but don't you think I'd be more productive if I had a desk?"

"The meeting will come to order."

'I like the way you handle responsibility, McWit, so I'm going to blame some stuff on you.'

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

Sign - Halt manager crossing

"That report on corporate redundancy... I'd like it in triplicate."

Employee won't think about work outside of box

"The good news is that we do have a little wiggle room."

"Well the good news is that after the reorganisation you'll be leading the team."

"No training period, but you can purchase my instructional video on line for $49.95."

"The new chairman has dropped the brain-storming meetings."

'We haven't improved quality, but we've made it easier to return.'

"Who gave you permission to ask for a raise?"

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."

"Who wants to hear a funny story about the third quarter?"

"In the event of an actual S.E.C. investigation, legal representation will drop from the ceiling."

"Quit stalling, Smithers. Where's the SALES chart?"

'Blast it, Peterson -- What's this I hear about you letting our profits trickle down?'

National Boss Monument.

"That arrow always goes to the bottom when I walk by."

"Perhaps this slide whistle can better illustrate what this graph is telling us."

"Janet, cancel my Guido's reservation. I'll be having lunch in the office."

Armstrong, the only doctor covered in the new health plan you got me is a veterinarian! Beats no coverage. Yeah, if you're a parakeet. You're so cheap. You don't value me at all. You ingrate. I didn't have to give you health benefits. Lots of employers don't cover their animals. You mean workers. Stop your barking.

"My preferred pronoun is they."

In and Out Tray

"Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?"