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'I can't teach kids nothing if they ain't got no aptitude.'

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

Boy and girl at thier studies

"I'm beginning to regret taking this job at the local playgroup."

Interdisciplinary studies.

Continuing education.

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

"Three more years of high school."

Paranormal A-Z...

Conflating Science and Grammar. The boy threw the ball. What grammatical role does "ball" play in this sentence? An object in motion!

"I want a top education, but don't milk me dry with school fees."

"Sarah's grades are excellent. She got A+ in 'Yogi Berra: Philosopher or Fall Guy?,' A in 'Dollars and Scents: An Analysis of Post-Vietnam Perfume Advertising,' A in 'The Final Four as Last Judgment: The N.C.A.A. Tournament from a Religious Perspective,'

'Add the numbers, divide by how many numbers you've added and there you have it-the average amount of minutes you sleep in class each day.'

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

"The day at school? Oh, you know, the usual psychological and educational stew."

"Ma, what does 'kosher' mean?"

"This is a test. This is only a test. IF this had been the real world it'd be your job you'd be fighting for, not a letter of the alphabet."

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

'I like the history professor but I think he's mired in the past.'

"So the secret to getting good grades is to study hard...seems a little extreme!"

'You don't have to worry about my future any more -- I just downloaded an entire college education!'

'My name is Jeremy and I approved this message.'

'This scholarship application is great. You must have received an A in creative writing.'

Teacher: 'As an adult you'll probably only use a quarter of what you're taught at school - which brings us to fractions.'

'It's not for homework. It's for traction.'

"You know, I'm really more the 'humanities' type."

'My teacher said the school has tough new standards and I need to improve my vocabulary. What's 'vocabulary'?'

"Of course you'll study Latin. How else will you learn the names of your dinosaur friends."

"I wasn't copying off others. I was just crowdsourcing the answers."

'So far more education hasn't helped me get a job. I think I'll get some student loans and get some more education.'

Fuzzy Math.

'There's one app we can't give you ... aptitude.'

"Studying friction is a real drag."

'Hey, Dad. We learned all about the Kama Sutra at school today... Oh no, not the Kama Sutra, I mean The Magna Carta.'