Taxonomy Buff T-Shirts

"I think of myself first as an American, then as a bird, then as a rufous sided towhee."

"I don't know what you are either. I'll just write 'small brown bird'."

Prize vegetables.

Zoology Class. Test Today. What did you get for the question about Fuzzy Wuzzy?

Plant Lady

'Upon entering the rain forest...' 'Thousands of unknown species, and we can fool around with the genes of every one of them.'

Garden Goddess.

Before the Internet

The Age of Reptiles. . .

Igor hesitated - "You give me that silly old brain, and i'll give you these magic beans!"

Hermit Crabapple Tree

"Would the widdle Venus fly trap like a fly? You'll have to beg for it."

'A rose by any other name means I flunked the botany test.'

'Did you just hear that? We are now and endangered species and mating is now our top priority!'

'I don't know much about history, don't know much biology ... but we'll be OK if there's a round on song lyrics.'

"Oh, quit your whining. At least yours comes back in the Spring

"Takes the food right out of your mouth."

Arnold's first day on the job - 'What do you mean...no director!!!...and who is going to tell me what to do?'

Academic Jeopardy - "The great unknowns and cosmic uncertainties of the universe are reduced by this number daily."

"The homes in this area are beautiful."

'Don't you think it's just a little weird to have a cemetery for houseplants?!'

'I'm 3 years old - that's 21 dog years - so start pouring!'

He's making a list --- Holmes solves cases quicker when he itemizes deductions.

'Uh-oh... when mom calls me by my full latin species name, I'm in big trouble.'

'Sir, your tweeting coach is here.'

Quiz Night...

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

Switch on brain

I read on Candorville.com that was rank 29,705th in the world when it comes to attention spans. What? Aren't there only 196 countries? The article didn't just include human countries. It included the various animal kingdoms and the plant republics. Did you know that Americans have an eight-second attention span ... but the goldfish who live in little Lionel Brown's aquarium kingdom at 1492 MLK Way in Candorville have a nine-second attention span? Are you sure you weren't reading a humor column?

"The official measure of an inch is three iPhones stacked on top of each other."

"There! Isn't sipping my Tropical Surprise more fun than arguing over some ancient sports trivia?"

"Rats, I thought he'd like my science project!"

'Did you know there's a river in Brazil named after Amazon?'

'Tax.'

'Let's go to the Horticultural Show and taste the exotic flowers...'