Tax Doc Titan Pillows

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'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

Flat tax - equal burden?

I don't think we can survive here. There's little chance we can afford the taxes.

'Congratulations! You're the proud father of three healthy, bouncing tax deductions!'

"Which tax bracket are you looking to avoid?"

Yes, they are all dependants."

"Marions nous! Tu payes les impôts, j'offre le resto!"

"It only made sense for us to finally merge."

IRS Audit Section

"You really clean up on these mileage deductions, don't you."

Dr. Kapuchnik, I feel like there are powerful, sinister, unseen forces conspiring to do me harm, even though I haven't done anything wrong. Does this condition have a name? It's called April 15th, Al. Tax day.

'Don't worry! Since 28% of my salary goes to the government, I've decided to work 72% of the time!'

'Due to recent staff cut-backs and consolidations, I'll be handling your death AND your taxes this year!'

'I got a big refund on my income tax.'

"Amazing deduction, Holmes!"

IRS, 'I think we should audit this one, sir -- his signature looks shaky.'

'Don't come too close - this baby will tear you to pieces, bite your head off and drink your blood... I've called him 'Fiscal Policy'.'

'I've got the world by the tail. How much is this going to set me back?'

"On the one hand, I'm glad they're cutting the school year short...on the other hand..."

'I load on the job all the time so I figure it's not really 'earned' income.'

'He's trying to persuade the Inland Revenue that it's a tax haven.'

"I'll match donations when you match my tax payments."

IRS agent to professor scrutinizing tax return under microscope: 'Still looking for that tax loophole, professor?'

'How do you expect the Government to bail you out of your financial crisis if you don't pay your taxes?'

"Carpe De Revenue!"

"It was Socrates, wasn't it, who said, 'The unexamined life is not worth living'?"

'Okay... now everyone smile and say: 'that;s not deductible'.'

"Taxation, meet Representation."

I've managed to get your tax bill down to zero, this year ... however, my bill is $10 million.

'I'm dressed as a vat inspector.'

'Well, well. You made more money last year than you did the year before -- You people never learn, do you?'

"I now represent both death and taxes."

IRS, 'You filed your tax return two days late -- Why do you hate America?'