Tattoos Gifts

Accountant getting a tattoo ('Born to Depreciate!')

"Never get a tattoo when you're drunk and hungry."

"I'm getting the fire-breathing dragon with wings. He wanted $200, but I talked him down to fifty bucks."

'I want you to meet my son Edward. One day, this company will belong to him and I think it's time for all of you to get to know each other.'

'Man, I hate needles!!'

'Hmm...yes, I'm afraid it is a sign of cancer.'

Please be gentle. I have a very low threshold for pain.'

Cow having a tattoo.

"First, as an ice breaker. . . how many of you have tattoos?"

'All my kids are grown and have moved out. How much would it cost to remove this tattoo?'

'No. It's not a past girlfriend. I'm a tort lawyer.'

'Kim, you can't leave me!!'

"It wasn't easy. You know how ticklish I am."

'If you would like to read more, the fine print is tattooed to my foot.'

"I may come to regret this one." (Tattoo reads 'do not resuscitate).

'I imagine you're interested in one of the more highly visible occupations?'

'You have got to be kidding.'

'We all do a lot of stupid things when we're young. So, what'll take to remove that 'Butterball' tattoo?'

Old lady gets leaves tattooed onto her varicose veins.

'My kids are grown and have moved out. How much would it cost to remove this tattoo?'

'Will the surgery leave a scar?'

Tattoos sagging with time

Tattooed Patient

At this time of night Alan likes to show guests his tattoo.

Overly pierced man in a lot of pain.

Tattoo Removal

"I'd like a tattoo that says I'm my own man. But put it sompelace my wife won't see it."

"I have a surprise too. Until I really like a guy, I never give out my real name"

'Before we get married, Doris, there is something I need to get off my chest.'

'I suggest placing it up here. Over time it will eventually end up where you want it.'

Don't Label Me.

"That's all very nice, Jefferson, but do you have any other new business?"

'Aren't you done yet? This is taking forever! I should have went somewhere else!...'

' . . . and if hired I promise not to wear clothes that accentuate my skin art.'

"And this is what the tattoo you've chosen will look like in thirty years."