Tail-wagging Readers Gifts

A dog reads a newspaper

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

Dog lover

"He's already getting attached to you."

"Do you recall the exact moment the balance of power shifted?"

'Thank you for flying Canine Airlines. You can now sit on the furniture.'

'When he comes through that door, let's all jump up and give him a big kiss!'

"Who's a good boy? You're a good boy."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were my dog Willie."

'No JAMIE,you're NOT keeping any strays! Now GET rid of him and go wash up for dinner!...' / 'Sorry kiddo,i tried...'

"You've already been for a walk."

"If you don't make up your mind who's taking me out, I'll do it right here."

'They do say they're a shy breed.'

Good boy

"Thanks for your concern, and yes, I'm a rescue dog, but that's my actual job title: I rescue people..."

K9 Authors.

'Don't get me wrong, the professional dog-walker is nice, but it is not really the same as if my Master was walking me...'

"No, I did not sniff you!"

'I heard my master say I was getting fixed...I didn't even know I was broken!'

Headshot of perky dog.

'My wife doesn't understand us.'

The four freedoms: freedom to bark, freedom from fetching, freedom to sleep on any piece of furniture, freedom from leashes.

"My dog is NOT a child substitute. Not according to his headmaster anyway."

"When did you become such a big animal lover?"

"I got you the same thing."

"No, I'm not faking it, I'm really happy when they come home."

"I say you're spoiling that dog."

'Don't worry... Buster's always digging-up something or other!'

"I can die at peace now knowing your toe nails are neatly clipped."

"Absolutely perfect! How did you know?"

'He hasn't got a tail, so he wags everything.'

"Mr. Wakefield and Bowser? Or Bowser and Mr. Wakefield?"

"Good dog!"