Tail-chasing Thinker Pillows

"Remorse sits in my stomach like a piece of stale bread. How does that sound?"

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

"His real name is Major, but everyone call him GET DOWN!"

Dog lover

Rusty starts to have very violent thoughts toward his tail.

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

'We can't go on meeting like this'.

"Do you recall the exact moment the balance of power shifted?"

'When he comes through that door, let's all jump up and give him a big kiss!'

"I finally caught you... now what?"

'What's amazing is that I only threw one stick.'

'I get the feeling you're wagging your tale on the outside and crying on the inside.'

"Who's a good boy? You're a good boy."

Dog Obedience School: 'I think we're going to have our work cut out with this one.'

'No JAMIE,you're NOT keeping any strays! Now GET rid of him and go wash up for dinner!...' / 'Sorry kiddo,i tried...'

'Technically, he's on a leash, so I say we let this one go.'

Of course your master calls you 'Man's best friend'. As your attorney I advise you to get it in writing.

Cat Zoom Meeting

"You've already been for a walk."

'Please forgive me for anything I've said or left unsaid.'

'This is no game! This is who I am!'

'No, and I mean it! We just went for a walk an hour ago.'

"Last night I dreamed I caught my tail."

"I think it's unfair to call her a "crazy cat-lady": She just loves all 63 of us..."

"It's been one of those days. I don't know if I’ve been chasing my tail or it's been chasing me."

"And here are today's categories...."

'They do say they're a shy breed.'

K9 Authors.

'Don't get me wrong, the professional dog-walker is nice, but it is not really the same as if my Master was walking me...'

"I had guys chase my tail, then one day I thought, hey, dummy, get rid of the middlemen and chase your own tail!"

"So what's on the agenda today? Let's see--nap, then count my spots, then nap again, then chase my tale, nap yet again, then beg for good, nap, scratch at the door, finally come in and find a spot to go to sleep. Just not enough time in the day."

Before you feed him/After you feed him.

'The woman who crossed the street when she say Marmaduke. . . I think she was his groomer.'