Tactical Planner Gifts

"How many of those 'email blasts' are we talking about, General."

'There's something I should tell you Boris. . . I'm actually right-brained.'

Weapons against intelligence

"Looks like we found the issue."

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

"We only got six days of funding."

'I work two jobs and have three kids. At the end of the day I am exhausted. Do you have anything that is not sexy and just smells good.'

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

"For heaven's sake, Ogden, it's vacation time! Must you make your little lists even on vacation time?"

'Fred, I want you to sanitize this, punch it up, dumb it down, leak it to the media and then be fully prepared to deny it!'

"All we have to fear is fear itself and unmet quarterly projections."

When Engineers Crack.

'The good news is we've discovered a vast new oil resource. The bad news is we need a space ship to get there.'

"The anger management consultant said he wasn't going to alter his **** dates at this t****stage which fits in with the 'managing change' consultant who said it was to late to change her plans..."

Failure/Due Diligence

Corporate departments as a metaphor for growing up.

Plan 'A', Plan 'B' - "I say we should go with plan 'A', sir."

'We took the old plan, folded in half, and now it's the new plan.'

Jack and Ina build their dream house.

'Does it bother anyone else that our entire business is based on one questionable product?'

"I think you might need to start again."

'Why don't you leave the planning of our wedding to me?'

Innovation & Calculation

"We've developed a five year plan that includes ample provisions for another five year plan if this one doesn't work."

"Compare Calculate Contrast Before you make a move"

Business cartoon showing sales declining so much that they bounce off the floor.

"After an extensive analysis of your company's strengths and weaknesses our recommendation is to give us more money."

"De l'huile bouillante, pas du fromage fondu!"

"Well I didn't see the incident myself.."

'We had no contingency plan for things going right.'

'Wait a minute -- you haven't said anything about a retirement age.'

"Does it ever cross your mind that we make a lot of money because no one else wants to do what we do?"

"We must kill this initiative, so let's mainstream it."

"Not the most impressive strategic plan I've ever seen."