Tactical Mind Pillows

Trojan horse.

You Are Here - Uncle Sam's Exit Strategy

"I hope I get rock and you get scissors, or I get scissors and you get paper, or I get paper and you get rock."

'Why don't you leave the planning of our wedding to me?'

Man mourns the loss of his king after being checkmated.

"Well I didn't see the incident myself.."

'So far, sir, we've rejected plans A,B, C, D, E, F, and right now we're evaluating'G'.'

Commando crashes into wall, instead of through window.

The Use of Cavalry

"I advise a slow, steady stream of lawsuits to weaken your enemies resistance. We call it time release litigation."

'With your permission sir... checkmate.'

"Let's do exactly what these pundits in the halftime report said we should do. If we lose, we'll blame them!"

"Once inside, the pawns will jump out and take them by surprise."

"They have special forces, but we have policy reports!"

'Bugger! My brain's just pulled a hammy.'

"It's baaaack!"

'Blue Fox to Swat Team: execute on my count of three and when officer O'Rourke has fastened his bootlace.'

"I know I told you to fool him into thinking you've got nothing left, but now you've got me convinced."

"Call it wishful thinking, but I don't think this peace will last. . . ."

'Thank you colonel we'll keep your strategy in mind.'

"The answer isn't more troops—what you need is an antibiotic."

Chess player painting all the pieces his colour.

"We're fighting them in zone A, they're our allies in zone B, and we don't know what to do in zone C."

'Ever have one of those days where nothing seems to go right?'

The disgruntled employees were brought down with tranquilizer darts, ending the worst pillow fight in recent memory.

'And that's the quickest way out of the car park after the game.'

'Don't ask me what play to call..I've only got a one year contract...you've got a four year scholarship...you decide what play to call.'

"At least it'll be dark when they climb out."

'I'm proud of the lads. They show'd a lot of character coming back from one down. . . then two or three silly goals. . . At this level you get punished. But overall I thought we were a bit unlucky. . .'

"Whose great idea was the four four two formation."