Tactful Communicators T-Shirts

'Excuse me, Mr. Pavlik, but that gentleman you called an idiot is here. Should I still say you're not in?'

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

Pet Shop - Parrot labeled as 'Good Listener'

Woman on the phone.

"Go on, say it again, 'I love you' in Armadillo."

"Don't judge me until you've walked a mile on my medication."

"We'll less than two metres again, don't know where, don't know when..."

'Of course, this social contract will have to remain hypothical until someone invents writing.'

By teaching the parrot a few key phrases, Marilyn no longer needs to nag her kids.

"I pick up on people's pain, Alexander. What's wrong?"

Time for speeches

'I don't get it. He's got only one tongue and two ears, but he talks twice as much as he listens.'

"I just want someone who texts me as often as Joe Biden does, you know?"

The Weather Channel. We're looking for someone who can talk up a storm.

Being unable to clearly articulate responses to interview questions is a common mistake...

"Your lasagna was dismal, as was the coffee, but you, Sofi, are fabulous at Pictionary!"

"Tell us again — a little less graphic."

"Your free-floating anxiety is floating over to me."

Communication

"I've found my voice, Penny. It's deep, wise, and compassionate."

'I'm dropping you a lion.'

'This is Kevin O'Shea, my big sister's answering service.'

If a tweet is sent out and no one signs up to read it, does it exist? Happens millions of times a day.

"Oh, hello darling..."

'Sure, I can talk, but I still feel culturally illiterate.'

Beaten up man to Good Samaritan: 'Thank you. My insurance doesn't cover roadside service.'

"Is it just me or does the price of the milk of human kindness keep going up?"

"Lord, if my prayers are pleasing to Thee, please confirm by fax."

'If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.'

"Anything wrong, sweetie pie? You've been ignoring the tip jar lately."

'This is Jake. I'm not in now, so please leave a message...HELLO! HELLO! This is Jake! Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm just mesin' with you! I'm still NOT in!'

I think I have too many apps.

"I'm gonna make this short and to the point."

'Always with the hugs! Would it kill you to kiss me once in a while?'

"It's like you haven't heard a single thing I've thought."