Table Setup Strategist Mugs

"Now that everyone's in...how do we get the food?"

"It's all a matter of planning...."

"First time visitors should always check the seating chart before entering the sanctuary."

Reserved space is reserved for a dinner table.

'This was designed for people who have mastered easy chairs and want to attempt something more difficult.'

"All your throw pillows were in knots."

"I just love candle-lit dinners."

'Why round? Why not square? Or rectangle? Or a triangle? Or . . . '

Office Furniture - Would you like to thump the table sir, to hear what it sounds like?

'No wonder it was so hard to assemble. I thought it was supposed to be a basketball hoop, not a weapon of mass destruction.'

"Let's change table stakes to vacation days."

"Somebody has screwed-up the seating arrangements" - Seating is an optical illusion.

"I try to get a head start on them."

'You should take one -- you could only improve your hand.'

'Will you make the final table?'

"Did I set the table right? Fork, knife, tooth brush?"

"Go human."

'There's only one piece left. C'mon, we can figure this out.'

'All dogs have four legs. All tables have four legs. All dogs are tables."

"Five settings? Who's coming over?"

'The frogs legs kicked the peas off the plate.'

"Sir Eustache is searching for a coaster for the holy grail."

Wedding Place-Setting Guide

Mind your manners and use a rounded tip knife instead.

"We'll alternate the windbags with the hard-of-hearing."

"Don't blow your nose on your napkin."

"Should we start without him?"

Is that an ace you're hiding, Ron?

'It was a complete surprise when the table-setting police arrived. I had no idea I was doing it wrong.'

Long table, long baby table.

Life style guru

Place Settings for the Elderly

"The blues in a terrible position"

"Card games can be expensive."