Sweater Wearers T-Shirts

"It was better before God took up knitting."

Romance

Things I've learned...

'I think he got embarrassed because of the sweater. . . Another dog started laughing. I told him it was just wheezing, but he wasn't buying it.'

"Shouldn't have, you really."

Christmas sweater alternatives

"Have you seen that sweater that you crocheted for me?"

'Why, yes, I think that's a lovely sweater, Peter... But you know the rule: no snacks unless you brought enough for the whole class.'

"I'm never ready for sweater weather."

Ugly Holiday Sweaters

"Why can't you just wear a doggie sweater?"

"Whoa. Jeff. You snagged your sweater."

"Arr! This isn't the map to the treasure, it's the map to me winter sweaters."

Academia in Winter

"We have every visible wavelength in stock. What color would you like to filter out?"

"It was a crime of fashion."

"We can only distract the shareholders with our ugly Christmas sweaters for so long."

"Everyone's always calling my sweaters ugly."

Keeping Warm

High in the Peruvian Andes, the alpaca sweater is born.

"What are you complaining about? You've been looking for an excuse to go off your diet."

'Well this is awkward.'

"Haven't you guys ever heard of 'casual Fridays'?"

'Don't be silly, I like my sweaters a little big.'

Reindeer Sweater

'Do red sweaters have that carcinogenic red dye #2 in them?'

Turtleneck Alternatives

Despite what his friends said about 'ugly Christmas sweaters', Chester couldn't wait to have his holiday pet photo taken...'

'I take back everything I said about this sweater you knitted for me.'

"Ms. Hoffman, we're from the SPCA investigating allegations of animal cruelty. Is it true that you force your small dog to wear holiday sweaters?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact, I do have a cat. Why do you ask?"