Suntan Comedic Pillows

Prisoner sunbathing in his cell.

"Are we going for suntan, personal development or being the envy of our friends on Instagram?"

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

it my imagination or is it getting warmer?"

'With all the tanning lotion, sun block and moisturizers, we're more coated with batter than the onion rings!'

A dog has inflated the family cats with helium and they are floating on the roof.

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

'Well no wonder it didn't work!'

"Cliff's really devoted to his art. He'll wait hours for someone to take a shot to the groin."

"Dad, has there EVER been a time when James Corden was funny..?"

The tanning channel.

'Personally, I don't question these things. My snout period will simply end when it ends.'

This is tech support. I will try to correct your problem, or perhaps create another problem.

'Please don't cover me with hot sand, Dear. It makes my skin so oily.'

"Are you new around here?"

Hi love...one less for tea tonight

Junk Stamps For Junk Mail.

'...and to you, he has left his leprosy.'

Rob Brydon.

"Rare, medium or well done?"

"She feeds me the same stuff every single day, yet I can't help approaching it like I have NO idea what it could possibly be!"

"And when exactly did your interest in health and safety start?"

'You know the rule, new guy carries the lotion.'

Trucker's tan.

'It's finished, my masterpiece - wait...'

"See? I told you our yard was too small for a swing set."

'Ark, Noah - not arc!'

"It said on the tin 'put on 2 coats'..."

'Seriously! Have you ever considered spray tan?'

'Someone call 9-1-1!!!'

'I demand a second opinion!'

'I had a great holiday, what do you think of the suntan?'

'I didn't spend all that money on a suntan for nothing.'

What if it was raining June 18, 1889?

"Suncreen's for the birds right, Oscar?!"