Sunday School Storyteller T-Shirts

"I learned that Moses partied on the Red Sea today."

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

Coping with a strong-willed child

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

Early Piety

"Today we studied Matthew, the first in a four-part series."

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

Teaching a Sunday school class didn't end the way John imagined.

That's all very well sir, but is it full strength, low fat, high calcium or soy?

"...and I, Pastor Smith...preaching to you now from this pulpit, speak to you from experience about the 'strong-willed' child...BELIEVE me!"

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

'A dog ate my homework.'

'I'll give your note to my parents but our family policy is to never negotiate with terrorists.'

"She said that girls mature faster than boys, so I pulled her hair."

"I thought your show-and-tell was really brave."

"Can you read the part about Job again?"

"I like to use new Bible words. Let's beseech Mom for cookies."

“Hands, Rachel. Clap your hands. Why on earth would I say, ‘If you’re happy and you know it, slap Sam’?”

"When I gave up cookies for the period of fasting called Lent, I thought it would be an hour, like the period of school called math."

"As a child of the pastor, did you stop and think that just because you can belch the books of the Bible, should you?"

'Moses parted the water so the Isrealites could go across? You mean in the mud?'

'Nice try, but Disneyland isn't a foreign mission.'

'When you pray, does God have call waiting?'

I miss recess!

Jesus plays peek-a-boo with doubting Thomas.

"Reverend, if we're born again in Jesus...do we get another belly button?"

"Coming soon...what I did over summer vacation...the podcast!"

"Tell me the story about Jonah and the big fish again, Dad."

BIBLE STORIES, 'This is full of battle and other BOY stuff - not a single romantic comedy!'

A Grade Two student explains why he is so eager to get back to school.

'God sees everything? You mean He channel surfs?'

"Pastor Bob is the leader of the flock, son, not the herd."