Sunday Chef Pillows

'What we were about to receive has gone the way of all flesh.'

LAY ZEE FUK

'Like death by salad.'

"I've just barbecued my head again."

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

Rusty, not believing in God, seized his chance...

'I think I'll go home and eat'

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas

You're the sizzle in my roast!

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

Little chef.

'I'm thankful you didn't make turnips.'

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

"Actually, it wasn't so bad. One minute I was standing in line at the slaughterhouse...The next thing I knew, I was being basted in my own juices..."

"Fridge-to-table"

"Ah! The Amazing Mommy and her tray of condiments!"

'Hello, Ebeneezer! It's me - the ghost of coming dinner!'

Alphabet soup

Soup Company: Chicken Stock, Beef Stock and Laughing Stock,

'You can't have a drumstick because this is roast beef.'

'I'm saving some for leftovers tomorrow.'

Scales

A man flips a pancake onto a child's head

"Who wants to help Grandma make her famous gingerbread man cookies? You kids get the flour, eggs, and sugar, and I'll get the protoplasm and epithelial tissue."

'I'm tired - let's outsource dinner tonight.'

"Come on, honey, try just one Goliath pea. It's organic, locally grown, and GMO free."

"Everything I needed to know I learned from my mother - but I usually follow up with a YouTube video for verification purposes."

"I was supposed to rinse them first? So, you're telling me somebody designed a machine to wash dishes, but we're supposed to make sure we wash the dishes before we put them in the machine?"

"For keyhole turkey carving we use a 12 mm port in each flank and third in the midline."

"This? It's my Thanksgiving outfit. It's already pre-stained in cranberry sauce and pumpkin pie."

'I'm in the mood to cook!'

Making Christmas Pudding.

'Mom, I followed your time-honored legendary family recipe for Brussels Spout Bake with one exception - I substituted a pizza for the Brussels Sprouts.'