Sunday Afternoon Relaxation Pillows

Man protecting himself from potential golfballs

"He's declared it an area of natural beauty"

'Can you mow the lawn? The kids can't find their trampoline.'

"Would you get me a beer from the refrigerator? Just grab one of the cans on the top shelf. Come on, I do so much for you—all these years, the walks, the food, the chases... Come on! Never mind."

"I'm not angry, but in the future I’d prefer it if you chewed up her Sue Graftons, not my P.G. Wodehouses."

"The parasol certainly paid for itself this summer."

Typical...the weather is lousy all week...then on the weekend it's too sunny to work.

'A loaf of bread, a jug of wine, a CD player, a laptop computer, a cordless phone and thou.'

A man sitting in the grass reading

"He's 'getting the grill ready for summer,' which means he's washing out the beer cooler."

"It says it's the vodka that's distilled twenty-nine times - they just can't seem to get it right."

'It's a shame you lost every last ball in the rough, Ed, but we're glad to have you back.'

"What'll it be ... scary movies or scary news?"

Water Gardening: And you will find yourself thinking over many garden problems at the waterside.

"What … have … you … done?"

"I'm getting bitten, and it's not by tall bond traders with accents."

Attention: Due to a lack of interest we have dropped the APATHY channel - Sorry for any inconvenience.

City Hammock

"Ahh, if I'm not much mistaken. The sound of a Lawn Chief 420. Fitted with a 3.5 horse power, Briggs and Stratton engine. Electronic ignition, variable valve timing and a 55 litre grass box. Mmm don't you just love our Sunday mornings dear?"

"That's better! - I can't bear the noise of the rain on my roof..."

Home theatre.

'Waiter, we'd like to see the 'breakfast in bed menu' please.'

'Dad, how long has Mom been working for us?'

'I will make an appointment to visit with a financial planner, dear--right after I get done taking down the Christmas lights.'

'He always breaks away from the Church on Sunday mornings.'

Spring

"What are you looking at?"

"It's five o'clock somewhere."

'Watching the football.'

"So what do you plan on accomplishing today?"

"A movie? I would rather watch this!"

Catching the Sun

"We missed out on the quality of life index again."

'It's Saturday, and it's my God given right to lie around, star at the clouds, daydream about the new guy in my class. . .'