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Wine of the Day Club

"I told you not to invite that guy!"

'Just remember, he's bigger, but you're funnier. As soon as he starts laughing, you've got him!'

EU

"Now, now, relax. All you're gonna feel is a quick jab."

"What kind of aggressive therapy?"

'Our Anesthesiologist resigned recently.'

Kid in hospital has I.V. in him that is a straw.

Boris Johnson vs Corona

"I'm sorry, your grapefruit subscription ran out and I forgot to renew it."

"I've been a postie for 20 years. . ."

A boxing match between Apple Brown Betty and Apple Pan Dowdy

Antibiotics versus probiotics: A battle of wills.

"I just dialed 1-800-BAGUETTE."

'We've engineered this cow to produce 30% more milk ... and look at her work that speed bag!'

Boxers vs. Briefs

Time-of-the-month club.

One more ring andBbob would set off the Solicitor Glove.

"I Win!!!"

Subpoena-of-the-Month Club

'Oh, I'm sorry Frank, it's just when you come home in that outfit, sometimes I lose control... so anyways, when's dinner?'

"Date night again already?"

"And, in this corner, weighing five pounds more than she'd like..."

'. . . 36, 37, 38, 39. . .'

Woman opens sushi box.

Penfriend

Actually, I really admire him. He pushes the envelope!

Biden vs Putin

' You really haven't grasped the concept of a simple cat fight, have you?'

"The following story is based on a Netflix original series, from a book published by Amazon.com."

Trump vs Biden

Two Popular Health Care Punching Bags

'The Eat Whatever You Can Grab With Boxing Gloves Diet was working wonders for Bertram'.

The lesser-known, and ultimately unsuccessful, Joe Louis and Dick Clark expedition.

EU-budget fight