Sublime Sitter Mugs

"Show off."

Church for sports worshipers.

"He's no hat and all corgis."

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

"That's the preacher's dog."

"I'll be on the porch, pushing ninety."

'Work's the greatest thing on earth... so I'm saving some up for tomorrow!'

"How long have we been sitting on balls, Jon?"

"Won't be a minute Boss, just nippin' to the karzie."

Ice Fishing

'Late night with Norm Klosterman'

"The Hewletts have flaming crown roast au vin blanc every Wednesday."

'Why would I want an ocean-going yacht when I've got a rocking chair in my front porch?'

Action Film Shushing

'I love high-definition TV!'

'Seem the remote?'

Footballer's Wages

How To Sit When You Are A Kid

'The best part of growing old is not having to invest for the long term.'

Sorry, this game is not available in your area

"Hey! Who's this little guy?"

"I like you a whole lot better when you was alive."

'So what if Tex is sitting on your log? Pick out a new one!'

'Sorry to disturb you, sir, but coach is wondering if it is OK to put you in the game.'

"Hello there, Mulligan's pillows for better posture, let me leave you a brochure."

"Jehoshaphat! Look at that gait!"

"So, desk: yay or nay?"

'I told you these were great seats, but there is a downside. If you need to go to the restroom...'