Style-savvy Shopper T-Shirts

"How can we afford to eat at a place where the doggie bags are Gucci?"

Lamp Shades.

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

I thought you said Megson couldn't be bought.

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

"Where can I find the lefts?"

'Bread, milk, cereal, sugar, sausage, potatoes, beans, biscuits. Click! So easy, but I do miss the sexy till lady.'

"The Box is bigger, the contents smaller, increased the price and called it improved."

'Running your own business means being self-made, unfortunately it also means finding out what you're made of!'

Pam learned the importance of browser support.

"I think he said he wants to buy 'just the one'. You'd better fetch the manager"

'The difference between the sexes...First Contact...'

Ladies Fashions - "Money isn't tight - you are!"

STRIP Hambone: Expensive repair job

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

"I'm thinking of changing my parting."

"We can now shop for, purchase and crash our new car online."

"Aren't you glad we stayed in? I had time to order us some more sweatpants."

'Ridiculously Expensive Coffee.'

'Don't forget to delete cookies when you shop online!!"

"Debit card, no problem. Any cash back?"

'We want to adopt a kid. Do you have a choice our feng shui consultant can look at?'

I'm not buying a $25 set of boring hooded towels off a big box store baby shower registry. Mom fights the man! The local baby boutique will have a hipper selection. So true! Catch those adorable all-organic, artist-designed towels! Cute! And only $55 each! My pretentions are never cheap!

'I wish you'd buy another hat!'

"The curvature of the screen tricks the brain into perceiving that you're not overpaying."

"Most of it is the same, but if you look here you'll see that the price is twice as big"

"I often think of the 'Hereafter'. When I'm shopping I'm always asking myself 'What am I here after?'"

"This is our new one-piece for the more mature ladies."

'Going into business sale' at a jeweler's.

'They say gemstones have properties for relieving stress. . . once you get past the stress of paying for them.'

'Take ten years off the top.'

Maze Leading to a Cheese Shop

'I can just make it out. She's saying 'call my hairdresser'.'

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'My wife doesn't just allow for inflation - she helps it along.'