Structured Thinkers Gifts

"I wish that life was as logical as Algebra."

The Department of Really Stupid Ideas: 'Most people think they just appear out of thin air! But the truth is, there's a great deal of very hard work involved!'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"Stock options for your thoughts."

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

'I pledge allegiance to the atom, and to the periodic table on which it stands, many particles indivisible, with orbitals and electrons for all.'

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

"Be patient. He'll have to visit the water cooler sooner or later."

Employee won't think about work outside of box

'You think I'm crazy; I think you're crazy...finally some common ground!'

"We need a best practice swim lane to leverage our core competency, move the needle outside the box, and open the kimono while keeping our ducks in a row. Can anyone give me a sustainable solution to more vertical effectiveness without getting too granula

'I want you to paddle against the current.'

'I am willing to concede that the company has been underperforming of late...'

"Is it just a scary coincidence that the words 'changes' and 'unknown' both have 7 letters?"

"You're a genius, Shaw. This is an idea whose copyright has expired."

"Serendipity is not a strategy."

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

"He's his own worst enemy."

US v.s. Tech Giants

"What's wrong with swallowing up other companies?"

When Engineers Crack.

Target your customer.

'Our job will be to drag the competition down to our level.'

'I'd like to explain my ideas for economy within the company.'

"Weather like this plagued my retreat from Moscow."

'Maybe we should sign him before the MVP award is announced.'

Think Tank

Not thinking BIG enough: Nickel & Dime Bank.

"What if we're just a ship in somebody's bottle? Yar, here comes me existential crisis."

'Could we finish these negotiations via e-mail? That will allow me to think before I respond to your proposals.'

Jack and Ina build their dream house.

'Look, can't we just build the damn thing next to the quarry?'