String Seeker Mugs

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

Mr. Punch's Fancy Ball

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"Max! Oh, my God! There's like a billion moving ideas in there!"

"His exercise wheel has lost all its fascination sinces he started reading Hemingway."

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

Pampered and poodled.

"And now. . . which shoes?"

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

"Tell me again, Grandpa, about how you let your freak flag fly."

'I'm not being punished! I'm reading because I happen to enjoy reading!'

Blue Stockings

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

'They've certainly got designs on your purse!'

The Dragon with the Girl Tattoo.

Goldilocks and the seventeen black shoulder bags

What would Charlotte Bronte do, she thought to herself.

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

"I don't like your application."

Mister Pretty Shoes

Antonio Vivaldi

"Do you do much walking?"