Stress Management Gurus Pillows

'I'm sick of all the stress - when's the next canoe coming - what if there are two canoes - who takes which one?'

'The recession is now affecting Ralph's hairline.'

"It's either the Incredible Hulk or Jones has crashed through his stress barrier!"

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

"Three weeks until the pitch, LOADS of time!"

"The president demands that staff take responsibility for failures, and the multi-trillion deficit is down to YOU!"

"When troubles begin to take their toll, it’s nice to take a little stroll!"

Late/Too Late.

"Good morning Rudy. I suppose you're wondering why I've summond you....It's time for your annual performance review...."

Fragile stamper.

'You obviously took my suggestion to reduce stress to the extreme.'

The Adrenal Gland Answers Your Questions

'I'm down to a pack of neuroses a day.'

'That's my 'job security' barometer.'

"I've got a strict work/life policy at work... Anyone who has a life doesn't work anymore!"

'I call it laziness - He calls it stress management.'

Office Ergonomics.

"I'm going to tell them our number one way to be stress-free is taking a day off to go fishing."

"Have a good weekend!"

"Jerry's blood pressure jumped to a six month high on News of the dollar's weakness."

Monday around 9PM.

"Dude. You seem tense."

White flag being waved around bosses door.

'I wished I'd known about this club last week. I'm really stressed out at my job!'

Whelmed and Over-Whelmed

'My doctor told me avoid any unnecessary stress, so I didn't visit him today.'

'The trouble with success is that the formula is the same for a nervous breakdown.'

"It's bad. He's not even responding to my emails."

"I don't understand, having a pulmonary embolism isn't on his to do list!"

"I have had three work-related heart attacks, witch shows you that I care about my job."

"You're incredibly tight."

"Oh, stop hyperventilating! You went on vacation to relax, remember?"