Stress Eater Gifts

Office of Tax Simplification. Use other door. Not an entrance. Doing my taxes is confusing! It's so stressful I eat junk food for weeks. So, the same thing happens every April ... I find myself in a bigger slacks bracket.

'Ms. Hanson, bring me some extra-strength comfort food.'

'I've had a really hard day -- make it a two-trip salad bar.'

"I sometimes eat and drink too much. My stomach gets very upset about it."

Covid-19 Caution

Exercising in Confinement

"You may have the weight of the world on your shoulders, but that's not why you're 10 pounds heavier."

"Before discussing the dismal financial outlook, let's order lunch...dessert first."

"I lost a client today and then the boss reemed me out and to top all that, I ran out of gas on the freeway. But all I could think about was that grilled cheese sandwich I was coming home to."

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

"I'm feeling completely wiped out."

Fight or Flight

'I can't control my anger when people get too close to my kids...'

Some days at work can be more challenging than others.

'I have much less stress since I replaced my in box with a paper shredder.'

It was getting worse. Bob's power suit kept wanting more and more, whereas Bob just wanted out.

"Don't worry about missing the meeting, Henshaw. We assigned all the actions to you."

The number one injury in today's workplace: severe bends caused by repeated exposure to deep-dive presentations.

Your Work/Life Balance Is Off. Shall I Auto-Correct?

"I feel your pain."

'It's 930am ma'am - time to meet the Board of Detractors.'

'Who wants to work late again, raise your hands.'

"Well, all the symptoms of just another typical case of burnout, I'm afraid."

"I keep telling myself I've got to slow down."

"I'm too busy to be stressed."

'I want to empower you to fulfill your potential! If you can work 16 hours today, then your 20-hours shift tomorrow should really elevate your self-esteem'!

"Just heading out for a good cry, care to join me?"

'I'm glad you're able to be with us more, but I'd appreciate it if you'd say you're 'spending time' with us, not 'doing time' with us.'

Stresses Can Have a Motivating Effect...If They Don't Kill You!

Danger Slow Sand.

"The boss is charging. I knew you shouldn't have worn that red tie."

"When you've been here as long as I have, you'll start to burn out"

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."