Stories Prints

"We need to stop sharing one set of clothes."

"My self-esteem was so low I just followed her around everywhere she would go."

Need tickets.

'So when does the doctor think your mononucleosis will clear up?'

"Your son's autism is still affecting his job, but we're learning to deal with some of his repetitive symptoms."

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

'That's my weird Uncle Benny. He claims that he was abducted by aliens in white lab coats.'

'Of course he didn't believe the stork story. Try telling him we made him with a 3D printer.'

Humpty Dumpty after the Fall

Curosity killed the cat

'Don't worry Mr Dumpty. We'll bring suit against all the King's men and all the King's horses for practicing medicine without a license.'

"I wouldn't worry about the big bab wolf - he can't muster much puff."

Cowardly lion is carrying a keg of courage.

'Of course, that's just one mirror's opinion.'

"Sorry Buddy, no singles!"

"Same old, same old, Rapunzel.

Turning Japanese: I really think so.

"Before I fight this dragon and rescue you, can I ask a few questions? Like, do you want kids? What's your passion? Where is 'home' to you? Do you have a financial philosophy?"

A boy with his finger in the dike prevents the Great Flood.

Fairy Library - Frontispiece to Jack and the Beanstalk

"Must get big stone."

'The story of how I invented the yo-yo is a classic tale of highs, lows, highs, lows...'

'Do you always have to be so quick?'

'Look - when I read you a fairy tale, don't keep saying 'Really?' '

'If it's going to charity, then I want a receipt.'

Sleeping beauty

'Don't worry lads, he's always on the internet these days.'

Frying pan tells other utensils: 'So anyway, the Pot called the Kettle black and that's when it really kicked off ...'

"It's about this Hans Brinker boy. Either you stop him or he stands to lose a finger!"

Horny Nanny Seeks Lonely Goat Herd.

I'm going to read you a bedtime story...

'No, I'm not really a handsome prince, but it's a great way to meet girls.'

Adam and Eve in Paradise

The tortoise and the hare - Aesop's fables.

"I can't approve of your office gossiping, Frank...and after you tell me the latest I want it to stop!"