Sticker Shock Survivor Mugs

"Great God Almighty! Somebody please wake me up and tell me I'm only dreaming that the chicken marsala costs a whopping twenty-eight ninety-five!"

"Hey, you stick your neck out on a regular basis, it's gonna happen. The important thing is to just get up and keep moving forward."

"It says here that in your last job you did a lot of traveling."

Honest Voting Stickers

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

Dear Diary, 36 weeks on this island and I'm starting to feel that I'll never get rescued."

"I can't get the price sticker off this non stick pan, you sold me!"

'And you say your face after you looked at the bill I sent you for your last visit.'

'Look at the bright side. Think of our mutual funds going up, up, up!'

'I sure hope you're a marriage counselor.'

Uniformed but Passionate

"No, we're no gods, we're God's gift to women!"

"Honestly, I'm as sad as you are that your mother didn't make it."

'The tide goes out along way, doesn't it?'

'You're trying to hail a taxi?... Are you insane? You'll never get one at this time of day!'

Bumper Stickers: 'God is my co-pilot', 'My co-pilot has a map'

'Is there any particular reason your middle name is stinky?'

'While we didn't see Bill Brewster here in his lifetime, it's good to see him here in death. Uh, let me rephrase that.'

"Ma'am, are you aware of how many braggy, preachy bumper stickers you've got plastered on the back of your car?"

Message in a Bottle: 'If your reading this my hair do is already ruined.'

"I'd say my number-one issue is getting off the island, and then, after that, probably health care."

'LAND!'

"I'm sorry, but I believe I'm now way out of your network."

'Don't worry, the first 30 years of bee keeping are the hardest.'

'Whose darn idea were these brand stickers?'

In the embarrassment cemetery

"Do you have any idea how small the print is on your bumper sticker?"

Tiptoeing around voltometers.

'In time you will learn that somehow my parents are responsible for this.'

'No need for that. I owe taxes, they'll find us!'

'What did I tell you about keeping bees?'

Man scraping the snow off his car greets neighbour who is scrapping off advertisements.