State Legislator T-Shirts

Stepford Council

"Oh, I'll be bi-partisan alright, punishing both sides of the aisle."

We Tenatively Oppose War on Strictly Procedural Grounds

"I want to dispel the rumor that this redistricting map was drawn by my toddler on an Etch-A-Sketch. . .I'd never met that toddler before."

'Answer these constituents letters. Tell them to go to hell in a nice way.'

"I plan to read the constitution this weekend. Is it long?"

Civics Class: Mock Election Today. Oh, no --- Another multiple choice test!

European Union: Entering a prohibitive tax zone.

"Of course, when I say we the people I mean I the people."

CONGRESS, 'No, no, you don't HAVE to fool all of the people all of the time - you just need to CONFUSE them!'

"Hold everything! I just thought up a terrific loophole!"

How a Bill Becomes a Law, 2023

The Republican's Plan One: No Obama!

'Be right back -- I have to sign some ennobling legislation.'

'Just think of one of these as enabling legislation for the golden rule.'

Beware of the Legislation

The ways and means committee reaches the tipping point.

"So you want to give yourselves a pay raise and change term limits so you can continue to ignore voter mandates and introduce ridiculous legislation?"

Who Let the Dawg In?

'I know we can't repeal the laws of nature, but I don't see why we can't amend them a little.'

Welcome to Washington, D.C.!

The Second Amendment - The Right of Not-TOO-Obviously Insane nut-jobs to keep and bear . . .

CONGRESS, 'No, no, you don't HAVE to fool all of the people all of the time - you just need to CONFUSE them!'

'Lobbyist for 'Big Sugar' is here to see you, congressman. . .'

Gun Control Rally

'The Supreme Court found the new law constitutional, but struck it down anyway because it's politically incorrect.'

'I wouldn't put much faith into Senator Bludgeon's promise to immediately begin investigating the competition. After all, it takes 30 days just to make instant coffee in the Senate.'

"Welcome to Alabama. Pro-life at birth; not so much after that."

"I don't think we can take 10,000 lakes as collateral."

What comes after a trillion

Sen. Krupt. Your vote should never be for sale. It's much more efficient to rent it out!

'Some democrats and Republicans sat together at the state of the union.'

Lame Duck Session

06 Congressional Record.

'This isn't an easy business- you have to stoop low and be high-handed at the same time.'