Starting A Travel-related Job T-Shirts

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

A private jet takes off

'You're off the plane, Hal. Put the laptop on your desk.'

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

'He must be going economy!'

'I'm just here on a lay-over.'

"Today we can help herd cattle, go on a nature hike, get a sauna and massage, or go into town and rob the bank."

A Simplified Map Airport Map

"Err Stewardess? Do you have a sweet? I think my ears are about to pop."

"This is the main house, plus there's a cottage on the property where your Lyft driver would live."

"I'd like to be the first to welcome you to our company. But, I've decided not to hire you."

'The service was crap.'

'We'd like to start by boarding anyone with hot food they've been waiting to eat on the plane.'

"Excuse me... I think you're in my seat."

'If God had meant us to fly, he would have made airline seats big enough to sit in.'

"Don't worry dude, that's not the intercom, here, give me the manual."

"Stay together and follow my finger."

"Gosh, you look familiar. Have we flown together?"

Wet Nursing Air Stewardess

Fresh Seafood.

Departure/Arrival

'I can book your reservations now. I'm checking listings for airline arrivals...departures...bankruptcies...'

"And to all of you who swore you'd never fly this airline again - welcome back."

'I like to relax before my business flights.'

'Airport Check in' "Groping or non-groping"

Prepping for Rerserve

"You're so lucky – I can never sleep on planes."

Arrivals Departures Bankruptcies

Beverage Service "Distancing"

Seasoned Traveler

"I understand he's here on a business trip."

"...and over there, are the foothills of Misery Mountain."

"Going camping?"