Stamp Sleuth T-Shirts

'Slade, I need help with a blackmailer ... and could you find me a 1928 Canadian?'

'Alright, gentlemen, let's make a stamp deal.'

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

'It's not for myself, you understand."

'I'm not afraid of commitment, but forever is a really long time.'

Letter Collecting Nerd

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"

Roentgen tries to figure out what he's discovered.

'The dog ate my homework -- I thought maybe you could X-ray him.'

"I need to self isolate. . . but I thought I'd better come in and see you first!"

'Stamp collecting has gotten more competitive.'

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

"Essentially Wilkins proves things and Brenner disproves them."

Medical Library - Large books with really revolting photographs

IRS, 'I think we should audit this one, sir -- his signature looks shaky.'

Newton's Law and Order.

Undercover Biophysicists

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

GM Crops Genie.

"According to stomach content analysis he'll be dead in half an hour."

Galileo describes his discoveries to the church (and gets hit over the head by the bishop/pope with the telescope that he made the discoveries with).

The Animal Researcher Reports...'I've been watching this herd of cattle for seven years, and to be frank, I haven't seen them do anything yet!'

Schrodingers cat at the vets

They were long past their canine pasts, but the rare stamp brought out the beast in them.

'She didn't notice it was a wolf and not her grandma?? Had grandma never heard of electrolysis??'

'You're out of '50 Great Years of Mindless Consumerism?' How about 'Celebrating America's Shopping Malls?' That one, too?'

Genetically-Modified Foods: Are they safe?

"The search for a new painkiller has been a real headache."

'It's Yorick all right - I know his DNA well.'

'I still don't understand why I couldn't use the path to get your Jane Austen stamps.'

Professor Yomp is working overtime, trying to find a synthetic rhino horn.'

'Trying to steal secrets again, Dr. Figowitz?'

"Light at the end of the tunnel!"

You're certain you've had plenty of experience serving in a fine dining restaurant?