Staff Manager Mugs

"Misunderstood,overworked,underpaid and stressed, it's bound to lead to depression...still enough of my problems,what can I do for you?"

"So we're agreed then - there's no need to make any changes to our equal opportunities employment policies."

Impersonnel Dept.

'Henry has found his niche with us.'

'Staff management is pretty easy. If you've got a vacant job, give it to the employee of your choice. After that you place a job advertisement.'

"You remind me very much of myself when I was your age, Carter, and there is no way that this company would employ such a person."

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

Multi-tasking.

'These are job perks.'

"The president demands that staff take responsibility for failures, and the multi-trillion deficit is down to YOU!"

'I give this one about three months...'

'I have been hearing some disturbing comments about you, Parker, some of your employees think you're a nice guy!'

'Say, our stress control seminar worked! Our sales are way down...but so what if they are.'

'The ultimate sign of success is when no one puts you on hold.'

'Due to cutbacks, he lost his company vehicle, so he has to improvise.'

Stressed employee says to colleague: 'I think I'm on top of the situation and I hope I'm in the loop, but I can't seem to get ahead of the curve.'

'Congratulations Smith, you got that promotion. Commiserations Reid, you got that demotion.'

Busy office.

'He's finally done it - kicked breakfast TV!'

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

'Need I remind you who's boss here?'

'Normally, I would give credit where credit is due but we're in a credit crunch. Therefore, I will take all the credit for your hard work on this project.'

Pushy Dog

'You obviously took my suggestion to reduce stress to the extreme.'

The role of administration.

Brainstorm in progress.

"I'm giving you a 300% salary increase, and four months paid leave."

'I'm afraid I can't take you to my leader without a prior appointment.'

'It was at this point that the executive group began its hatha flow retreats.'

'Look Jefferson, much as I respect your emphasis of the informal approach...'

'Brains...brains...brains...'

Sales.

Targets.

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'