Stable Savvy Pillows

'Holmes, I keep telling you ... you've got to be more assertive with that horse.'

Investments - Founders Bear and Bull.

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

'My interpretation is that it deals with the artist's utter frustration over the scarcity of remaining, reasonable equity values.'

Ladies Fashions - "Money isn't tight - you are!"

August is corporate earnings restatement season.

"I'm thinking of changing my parting."

'I'd add 'UK' to your name and do it in big red letters...that'll be £15,000.'

Cleaning the Horse

Never clip him yourself unless you are an expert.

'Mom, I think it's time I graduated to a full size horse.'

Charging to a 10,000 Dow?

'We want to adopt a kid. Do you have a choice our feng shui consultant can look at?'

"Batteries for environmentally friendly electric cars. . ."

'I don't set the rules, but you do need to accept that you're a pony and move on Brian!'

'I can just make it out. She's saying 'call my hairdresser'.'

'Take ten years off the top.'

"This is our new one-piece for the more mature ladies."

'Hey, dad! Look what I got in trade for your golf clubs!'

'I'm trading futures in green sheets.'

"I used to be a racer: Giving people joy-rides is really really boring..."

Stock market news.

Designer labels "I'm sorry, but I think I've forgotten your name."

'I've fallen and I can't giddyup.'

Parking meter holdup

Horse Muzzles

"The good news is that the stock market is doing much better."

For once, I'd like to order a non-soy-based tofu substitute. No more health food. I have Tofurkey.

"Have you ever wondered what I'd look like in skinny jeans?"

'Maybe a tad too much eye makeup.'

'Gee, Doctor Dresher, you have a wonderful way with horses....

'The holes in this hay net are getting smaller! What are you trying to say buddy?!'

'What do you call a blonde doing hand stands? A brunette.'

"You're new around here."

A panhandler with a sign that reads "Sadder but no wiser".