Squirm Specialist T-Shirts

Menace.

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

Danae's Career Plans: 'The major product manufactured today is punditry, so I'm honing my argumentative skills to work my way to the top of the blow hard industry..my goal is to become a spin ninja...'

'I took a couple of years off after college to work on my smirk.'

Car Dentistry.

'Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, feel sorry for the people who have to work with you.'

'Your direction is good! Now try for distance.'

"Well, you taught him to fetch our slippers."

Odd Spas

"Get a move on Hardwicke, we need it for the 6 o'clock news!"

'I'd do better if I knew all the words you know!'

"Since you're always asking, here's a list of my various kinds of sighs, with explanation of what each one means."

"Please point out the problem tooth."

Savoy Dental Salon

"I slept funny!"

At the golf detox clinic.

Red wine teeth

' ... plus you need to floss better.'

'HEY,no Tongue!'

A man holding a golf club eying up his shot

He who laughs, lasts.

'I'm sorry, we can't give you a surgically inserted gastric band, as it appears you already have two!'

'That was a tough one.' Dentist fell on the ground

"Period of compete oscillation of pendulum..."

I hate to tell you this, but that's a can of maple syrup, not motor oil.

"I won't be in the office today, my apathy is acting up again."

'Baby's teething.'

'How's the spleen?' 'The spleen? Where is it?' 'I never studied the spleen.' 'I was left back in my spleen class.' 'I failed spleen.' 'I thought we didn't have to know the spleen.'

I've had a fantastic round, I've even got a ball left over!

'Nurse, I asked you to cheer up the ward.'