Squeamish Souls Mugs

'You're excused. Anyone else feel too squeamish to witness the procedure?'

"I don't want any gifts from the woods that crawl or slither."

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

Somewhere in France - The Eliot sisters come face to face with escargots.

Introverted Chair

An old, dancing man holding a steaming cup

Luring the babes is a cinch when you've got the right feet for the job.

"All I could find was this butternut squash."

I WRITE FOR THOSE/WHO STARE OUT WINDOWS/WITH LITTLE HAIR ON THEIR TOES

"Great, lots of students are fainting: that will teach them!"

"I'm sending you to someone who's less squeamish."

How to avoid a heart attack.

"Dry cleaning, pet store, Salvation Army - I'd be lost without my stickies on the dash!"

Dandelions

'Have you looked in the garden?'

'They've got everything...one even has it's own shed.'

Man on his way to heaven passes a sign "Heaven" up "Street Theatre" down

A planet like ours - "...you know I'm just playing with you before I kill you don't you?"

Joker in jail

'By accident they washed me with a conditioner!'

Indian using a mini bed of nail to reflex suns rays and get a sun tan

Cafe Menu: Freshly Strangled Chickens

A man's head disappears into his torso, replaced by a sign that reads: Next Showing 1:00

'She's 24'-24'-24' but she has BIG blue eyes.'

"Actually, it's 'they/them."

'And you're really sure this tanning equipment is safe?'

'I don't need a haircut. I just want you to use the vacuum thingy on my neck for 20 minutes.'

'This is the part of the job I hate.'

Obviously Positive And Negative Attitudes

Man in the moon, plus toupee.

'He can't stand the sight of blood.'

'I'm nobody's best friend, I'm an Indie.'

Alien in a hairdresser's.