Squash Squire Pillows

'Why, yes, a banner season for squash! What makes you ask?'

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

'This cave is really damp... and squidgy underfoot'

The Inn Keeper's Wife and Daughter taking care of the Don after being beaten and bruised.

The solar system is replaced by sports balls.

'And now for my William Tell shot.'

Woman disposes of partner's squash kit in hazardous waste container.

"All I could find was this butternut squash."

Knight

'No, I'm his cousin, Sasquash.'

Barrister uses legal speak to ask for two sugars in his tea.

'Since Darwin said it's survival of the fittest, I thought I'd better take up an aerobic sport.'

A Country Boy Throws a Turnip at the Squire.

"I may be your page today, but someday, I hope to be the whole book."

'for what we are about to receive...'

Squash Partners.

'Looks like the blighter's given me the slip again.'

'Don't be mad, I'm just following your instructions.'

Two sides to a question

"Sorry, but you can't be friends with a page! Pages become squires, then knights: our mortal enemies!"

It's taken two years work and ALL our savings, are you sure we will make millions from a Squash Ball Heater?

"I can't play squash tonight, Ed. I promised Linda I'd put in a little Kama Sutra time with her before the opera."

"And now, for your final exam, Caleb."

'Look here Frobisher, you've adhered to the rules. You haven't cheated, self-aggrandised or whined about money. That's rather unsportsmanlike of you.'

'Please give up badminton and take up squash or something.'

I didn't know you played squash, how about a game!

'My fee will be one third of the two million you're suing for, but remember, I do all the work.'

J. Edgar Hoover's secret file on MLK

'Okay, where's your chair?' - 'I've decided to squat for 8 hours a day to build my thighs.' - 'Won't that hurt?' - 'Fortunately, I've developed a massive pain tolerance by sitting opposite you for so long.'

Squash.

Two Men Discussing A Horse.

"I'm dating a squash champion."

'This is the part of the job I hate.'

The 'tough' life of a boy growing up in upper-class Britain.