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Football slave

Scottish Football Fan - "...and please Lord, let the result be against the run of play."

'Wow! That was some world series, Ella! Both Pujols and Holland were just amazing...'

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

'Frank built it himself. The last football will fall through the hourglass 10 seconds before the Super Bowl starts.'

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

"I will always cheer you on, but I will never 'Woo-hoo!' you."

'At least now the injury worries are over, we can concentrate on slagging off the team.'

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

Putting Practice.

"All of a dither as per usual!"

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

'John is watching the game under protest.'

7 can't-miss prayers to insure that your team wins.

'And now on the comedy channel Jose Mourinho's latest outburst.'

"Actually, Burt's weathering the stay-at-home thing pretty well."

Watching the football.

"Who do you like in the super bowl?"

'All this viewing is an endurance event in itself...'

'They've made this 3D football really realistic, it even chucks coins at you.'

It had been a while, but he had finally come home.

"Have I ever told you how sexy you look when you sit through overtime?"

"Whaddaya say we head home and curl up in front of a nice warm football game?"

'Double Dannys': Danny Baker and Danny Kelly.

"Thursday-Morning Quarterback"

Soccer games took on a whole new meaning for the parents of Hillsdale Youth Soccer.

'He gets confused switching channels between the World series and NFL games.'

'Are referees black with white stripes or white with black stripes?'

'Billy - no! Do not ask for his autograph. He'll lose his natural fear of fans, become a nuisance, and then he'll need to be tranquilized and relocated to Europe.'

Zdeno Chara

"Great news! Jim at work's promised to lend me all his World Cup DVDs"

"That's us stocked up for the Wimbledon final then..."

'With your 4-4-2 formation I don't think you'll see the end of this match.'