Sports Strategy Maestro Pillows

"This guy's a terrific defensive lineman. I once saw him chase down a quakerback for nearly 40 yards before sacking him. It was in a shopping mall, but still..."

The MBA Draft

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

Alternative fielding positions

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

Perils of the double play.

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

The Other Cooperstown

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

"I love fast break business success."

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

'You are dreaming the impossible team.'

"If you think it's tough at this level, kid, wait until you get into calculus."

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

"The good news is I used AI to fill in my March tournament bracket and I won the whole thing. The bad news is AI has become self aware and wants the prize money."

'Every team needs a role player. And your role on this team, Bill, is to sit at that desk and crunch numbers.'

'Blimey, boss - that's a bit revolutionary, isn't it?'

Baseball Clubhouse Pranks

'Are you blind ref?'

'..The wolves have got the sheep pinned against their own 1-yard line again!'

"Baseball is way too boring - so, we're doing one inning, winner takes all, everybody go home early and live their lives."

'Here's a play my backup QB designed. Everyone goes long and I throw to our opponent.'

"Marketing hired a golf pro as our spokesperson. Finally, we've got someone on the ball around here."

Rugby - Interesting line-out tactics.

'I hate PowerPoint.'