Sports Sticklers Gifts

"Why does he keep in the same players?"

TSA Noah

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

"Hey! There's a hair in my soup!"

"Penny's still having issues grasping 'icing the puck,' but she nailed 'offsides' and 'too many men' today!"

'Where's my glove?'

Camping with Mr. Thorough

Baseball player wearing a face mask.

'The beer's not cloudy, the glass is dirty.'

'You're allowed to pick up the ball before it stops rolling, you know.'

'I wish you would come to me first with your grievances, instead of going directly to the United Nations Committee on Human Rights.'

'It was owned by a little old lady. Legally, that's all I can say. She still owns the intellectual property rights to her story.'

Access Assessments

'Run around with sharp objects and you'll poke an eye out!'

"Whoes jumping? My secretary enforces a strict 'No Smoking' policy"

'The brakes are a bit dodgy, but the very loud horn compensates for that.'

D.I.Y ladder

Rare footage of a leopard changing spots.

'I'm fist-bumping all of my patients now, because it spreads fewer germs than a handshake.'

'Wanna play? We need another body... er... one more player.'

'Wow! I'm trying to fix my glasses with contact solution instead of super glue!'

World Cup. Half Empty.

'Don't you think this school has way too many fire drills?'

Skeets Champion.

"No no no...You can kick the ball into touch, not the opposition!"

"I'm sure it is making work more enjoyable. However, there maybe some liability issues."

"And remember, always keep two chevrons apart."

"They loved the food and service. But they hated the font we used in the menu."

Good parenting.

''Have you got any cockroaches?"

"The Department of Revenue and Tax? No, sorry, never heard of it before. You must have dialed the wrong number. This is the Department of Tax and Revenue."

Health and Safety vs Lawyers.

'No hitting below the belt.'

'There's been an accident down at the plant.'

'I can assure you our x-ray procedures follow very strict health and safety guidelines.'