Sports Nut Gifts

Rollerblader wears a cast and has wheels on crutches

'This is the worst case of Superbowl fever I've ever seen!'

'You're on Deck! Wilson! Hurry up with that pedicure!'

Football Fan

"Good game."

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

"Good For You / Bad For You"

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'My feet are killing me.'

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

"Even the waiters here are organic."

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

"I'm not having it if it's been genetically modified."

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

'Like death by salad.'

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

"You're a strong, virile stallion of a man, Randy. Has anyone ever told you that?"

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

We did a biopsy on the mole we removed, and it turns out it was just an old piece of chocolate.

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

"Did you know that when my mom played soccer, only the winner got a trophy?"

Mixed Doubles.

How about going easy on the carbs

Advocado

The Jolly Green Giant Squid

"Steamed vegetables."

'If you exercise you add 10 years to your life.' - 'But I would spend the 10 years exercising.'

"OK, ready to go again?"

"Empty again? What's going on around here anyway?"