Spiritual Investigator Pillows

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

"And these are the Fab Four Noble Truths."

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

"Home depot."

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

'Oh, crap.'

Unguided imagery

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

"Had more ghost-hunters 'round my place last night....scared the daylights outta me!"

"Tell her she's dead. I don't want to talk about the relationship."

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

"Honey, I’ve found God!"

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

'You must heal yourself.'

Madame Lucille - Fortune Teller 'I predict the future'.

FAQs.

'Eve wants a second opinion about the apples.'

"Yes, alright! I know it's a small mountain... I'm only a novice oracle."

'You can't come in here with that.'

We're willing to flee temptation, if we can leave a forwarding address.

'Yes, they were using it to clean up the graffiti!'

He snuck in on me again, didn't he.

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

Christian and Born again Christian...

"Are you willing to work the night shift?"

"It's going to be huge! Cheese-flavored vodka!"

Proceed no further if chakras not aligned.

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

"I'd like to have a word with you about this spirit animal."

The Path