Spin Strategist Pillows

'This one is for fighting in the front lines of the international spin wars!'

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

The MBA Draft

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

'Fred, I want you to sanitize this, punch it up, dumb it down, leak it to the media and then be fully prepared to deny it!'

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

Danae's Career Plans: 'The major product manufactured today is punditry, so I'm honing my argumentative skills to work my way to the top of the blow hard industry..my goal is to become a spin ninja...'

Library - Political Science section - 'What to do until the spin doctor comes'

Public Relations: Reputations cleaned and repaired

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

Perils of the double play.

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

'She'll never look for me here.'

The Other Cooperstown

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

"I love fast break business success."

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

And if the ball is completely unplayable...

"If you think it's tough at this level, kid, wait until you get into calculus."

'You are dreaming the impossible team.'

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

'This will be tough. The parents can handle Bs and Cs, but I really gotta spin this D in math.'

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

"The good news is I used AI to fill in my March tournament bracket and I won the whole thing. The bad news is AI has become self aware and wants the prize money."

'Every team needs a role player. And your role on this team, Bill, is to sit at that desk and crunch numbers.'