Space Joke Lover Prints

First attempt at the Big Bang

'Honest -- I had no idea they could jump that high!'

'Houston, I believe that you just ran over a Martian pedestrian.'

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

Man, my cat sneaks into the weirdest spots.

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

Save Our Universe

"Some mid-life crisis that turned out to be."

"Sir, a bunch of bald-headed, castrated humanoids wearing Nikes just materialised with their luggage back there."

"You know that moon was passed a minute ago?..."

'Can you believe it? - The doofus doesn't know whether this is the Alpha Quadrant or not!'

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

Astronaut: Pay and Display Only

'...it's some distance away - but there are lots of 'em and they're edible.'

"It's Houston. They have a problem."

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

'Sir, we're receiving a signal from space. It might be a candidate for possible intelligent alien life!' 'Nice going you ninny, you butt-dialled Earth! Now they're going to know we exist!'

'That must be the guy from corporate.'

Control Center. A satellite is falling! Tell NASA to divert it so it doesn't hit North Africa. Good golly, Miss Mali!

". . . And how long have you felt alienated?"

Moon's Portaloo.

Aliens would have destroyed us years ago if it weren't for our entertainment value.

Black Hole Corks

'OK, who stuck that wedding confetti star on it?'

The Moon Falls Out of the Sky.

'I've had a toothache for the last million light years, take me to your dentist.'

"This is where you'll be sleeping."

"What's wrong with this telescope? I can't see a blasted thing."

'I was chatting with Krog when, out of the blue, that thing fell on him.'

'Russian scientists have determined where the meteorite than injured 1000 people came from. Thet say, 'It's not from around here.''

Stand up comedians from outer space.

After our sun sheds the last of its energy and collapses in on itself... ...after the solar systems degraded, their planets flung out and consumed... And after those billions of stars in their billions of galaxies are all slowly snuffed out one by one... ...and after the last of the supermassive black holes evaporates... A single last question will remain, drifting through the long, cosmic dark... To renew your universe, please update your payment details.

Spaceman serving shrimp.

A workman ponders a bolt on a track