Sound Alchemist Mugs

"Just play the hit single, then you can do the experimental track."

Diplo

"Our Rupert has swopped his gaming console for bagpipes...it gets us out of the house more often."

Marimba

'Why don't you ever look at ME that way?'

'Office Woofers. For the quiet and obnoxious boss.'

Bad Timbre: the world's first Garage Philharmonic Orchestra

"Woke up this morning, someone had nicked my guitar..."

Saxophone Player.

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

Artist and Musician

'What luck! A sound technician.'

'Incredibly Inexpensive Sound Engineers. Pretty Good Sound Engineers, 12 the price, 23 the quality. You'll hardly notice the occasional feedback.'

'He likes a room where he can reverberate.'

"Albert is the first whistler to use hearing aid feedback as an intro to one of his tunes."

'It's in case I need a laugh track.'

'Mom, was it one or two cps of sugar?'

"No, I'm still getting too much banjo."

Computer Music

The sounds of a tree falling in the forest.

"I'd know my tinnitus anywhere and this isn't it."

'This one is very effective. It sounds just like a can opener.'

The Gong

"You'll have to imagine the melody for this next song, too."

"The sea waves on my sound machine are attracting a following."

'Great! So that's the film... Now for the sound!'

2 Ohm and 4 Ohm Amps,

'I like the way you handle responsibility, Mac, so I'm going to blame some stuff on you.'

'Is that you cell phone or mine?'

The Invention of Bagpipes

'It's OK, it's not somebody strangling one of our friends: It's just a bagpipe player...'

'Here is your new stereo. It's got a SupaDeep Woofer System, with it's high octane surround sound, I'm sure it will fit smoothly into your life. But for God's sake; don't turn it on.'

"What do you mean, who are my influences?"

A Peek into the 2021 Noise Pollution L'Accord