Sonnet Aficionado Gifts

4 Rules For 'Serious' Poets

Shakespeare loved a grammar joke

Friedrich Schiller

Encyclopedic Novel Slam.

"Beyond the fine starting salary, the job of a poet laureate at this corporation also carries with it an excellent medical and dental plan."

"Before the defense rests, my client would like to read you a little sonnet he composed about his love for the jury."

"How else will I know when I'm clean as a hound's tooth?"

'It's only the library ghost - he was a great poet but a failed novelist.'

Olden Day Battle of the Bands (Bard vs Sonnet).

Little ship of horrors

'Just tell him two quarts of milk and a pint of cream, Will- it doesn't have to be a sonnet.'

Poetry Buff.

"You can whip out one helluva sonnet, Shakespeare, bit for sales copy, this sucks."

William Shakespeare

Nikolai Gogol

'How about that? -- Lady Godiva got a bouffant!'

Leonard Cohen

Sylvia Plath

Famous Like Song

Bob Dylan

Pam collected ceramic pigs. Just one so far, but even that seemed like too many.

Irish Writers showing mastery over English

Portrait artist drawing DNA patterns.

'Death, where is thy Sting?'

The Poet.

"Maybe he's waving and drowning."

"Imagine there's no heaven. . ."

'Wait a minute, this guy is missing a head Oh jeez, we're totally gonna crash,'

"Sure, I can help you improve your mating call: that's my specialty..."

"Problem is, it's the only song he knows."

'Major poets' 'Minor poets' 'Free agents'

'Your poetry totally captures the raw, primitive essence of the writing workshops you've attended.'

"Their lawyer found out that I enjoy reading poetry, and that I also like to watch professional wrestling. They're calling it a conflict of interests."

"I've got a bad feeling about this Kenneth.'

William Blake.