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Final Answers

I'm not saying I'm not a hound dog. I'm saying I'm not nothing but a hound dog.

'I don't know much about history, don't know much biology ... but we'll be OK if there's a round on song lyrics.'

"Using worst case scenario as a baseline, I consider this data quite encouraging."

"Those are the lyrics? How embarrassing—I've been singing it wrong this whole time."

NHS/Private Eye Care.

"Yes, 'the lion sleeps tonight', I know the tune, but it means it's had a good feed during the day, which is not really a good thing..."

"Imagine There's No Heaven. It's Easy If You Try..."

By the year 2500, 1 in 10 academics will devote their entire career to divining the meaning of the word 'sussudio'.

'Oh it's fantastic. It's my thirty fourth favourite sub-genre of progressive rock.'

George Gershwin, Psychiatrist

Onstage with the transgenic singers...

"Why do you wear green lipstick?"

Louie Louie Lyrics Challenge. Louie Louie, oh baby, we gotta go. Then what? Every night and day a ladle of me: Back of a girl all cuddly. On a gym that brings me there: A girl with a rose in her hair. Makes sense? Ladle of me? Ladle?! HOJ.

Today, this humble feature attempts to answer one of the great quandaries of modern times. Is it Louie Louie, oh baby, my hair gotta grow? Wrong! What are the lyrics to the Kingsman's Louie Louie?* *Must be gleaned by listening. No peeking on the internet!

"Bob, let's meet everyone. Amy is Director of Thought Innovation Solutions, Marcus is head of Transformative Mindset Empowerment, Terry's in charge of Scalable Competency Integration, and Gail is VP of Agile Enterprise Strategy. None of us knows what we do, Bob."

Office of Lyrics You Can't Understand

Punk Rock

"Try verbalizing it."

Genetic Engineering Dept - "You're once, twice, tree times a lady..."

Marooned Optometrist

"I can't believe the things I've heard coming out of his mouth since he started listening to Eminem."

'Boy! Those 911 operators sure get snooty when you call at 4 a.m. and ask them to translate the words to Frere Jacques.'

"You should only believe half of what I tell you."

"If we could decipher their language we'd have a clue to their intelligence levels."

'This is our conference room modeled after the United Nations so we can understand what our tech support people are saying.'

Personals: Decoder sought by F,NS,VEG,PROF with GSH

Russian Ministry of Disinformation

"Don't worry I speak fluent teenage."

And the unicorns shall come down with them, and the bullocks with the bulls; and their land shall be soaked with blood, and their dust made fat with fatness. - Isaiah 34:7