Social Skill Seeker Gifts

My new year's resolution is to stop putting my foot in my mouth all the time

"So, what do you do for play?"

Keeping all the balls in the air - skills

Do you have any other skills?

"I'm good at ticking boxes."

'Now that we've evolved, we should work on our people skills.'

How to Do Small Talk??!!

'I've been thinking about quitting, but it's the only thing that gets me out of the house.'

"Develop your social skills. Share information about yourself so people will want to talk to you." "I like to dissect animals."

"I think it’s time we started holding other kids’ hands."

"I know - it takes skill to sneak a peek at their tiny tags when you can't remember their names."

'I'd do better if I knew all the words you know!'

Ouija Bored

"Come on Hugh, you know you have to wallow in the mud hole before sitting down at the table."

'You're trying to find yourself? -- No offense, but if I were you, I'd look for somebody ELSE.'

"This one? This one? Listen, make up your mind, or I;m picking out a flea for you."

"I would share, but I'm not there developmentally."

Coming Soon: The G.P.S. for Conversations

Yossi's mother couldn't understand why he was struggling socially.

'Now that we've evolved, we should work on our people skills.'

"I just don't know if I have the energy to meet new people."

'Boy Scouts aren't ANY kind of terrorists!'

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

I knew a guy who was born with a sidelong glance. . .

"Are you talking to me?"

'I don't know anything about anything, but I'm great at looking stuff up!'

"Ms. Sims and I have known each other for quite some time, but it turns out we aren't on a first-name basis."

'I'd like to discuss your child's inability to interact with other children around him.'

Eye contact zone next 50 feet.

"It's our third date, can we look at each other now?"

"You're a people pleaser. We could work on that, but then no one would like you."

OWZAT...The beer-mat-flipping champion sets a new world record!

'Oh, please and thank you work okay, but I miss the old days as a baby when a blood-curdling shriek could get immediate service.'

"Today's alpha-lesson is 'become a vapor.' Wherever you are, be it a broom closet or a baseball stadium, carry yourself as if your body fills the entire room. Greet people with your arms out wide. Have a wide stance. A booming laugh. A wide open smile. Becoming a vapor is the best and most legal way to mark your territory."

"My super powers are listening and downsizing my life."