Social Security Administrator T-Shirts

'Live fast - Die young.'

'I see the truth-in-advertising-people got wind of the proposed privatising...'

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

"My email is down... talk to me."

Ethics exam cheater.

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

'Let's not go by the book.'

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

In basket-case.

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

'It seems every time my business grows so does my paperwork!'

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."

Online form - Submit.

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

In/Out/These Things Happen.

"I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal."

'Ok, I'm in a paperwork mood. Let 'er rip.'

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

Desk trays - 'in', 'out', and 'one of these days'.

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

'You'll like this, gang ? it's an 'eyes-only' list of 'shady-but-tolerated' loopholes allowed by the Securities and Exchange Commission.'

'Our parents were replaced by machines - We'll be replaced with new software.'

21st century water cooler conversations.