Social Satire Fans Pillows

"Quality of life insurance protects you and your family in the event of the death of your life style."

"Just a glass of wine with breakfast, officer."

The patriotic conference

"I always feel like a third and fifth wheel in social situations."

'Oi, where's my cup of tea then?'

Club Heaven.

A Tramp spraying Eau de Toilet.

Desert Island Social Distancing

"You know, there are other emojis."

Politically Correct Snowperson

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"Brian's fine. He`s got his own coping mechanism."

'Of course the Johnsons got the big cloud.'

The Vicar 's Invitation to Dinner.

"I prefer 'prostitute'. 'Media whore' implies that I'm not getting paid."

"Only three hundred and sixty-seven followers? Maria's not an asset to the abbey."

"I'm terrible with names, but never fail at fingerprint, facial or voice recognition."

'Next time you hear confession from that barmaid say, Tut-tut not COR.'

Attack Of The Guy From The Other Room

Recipes for comfort drinks.

"I always wondered who got my transplant."

'I wonder if you'd go out with me. I've always wanted to go to couples therapy.'

"You can find me on Inkedin."

'Oh no! The sharp elbowed middle class!'

'I'll have the Chairman-of-the-board Lunch, and Dexter here will have the Sissy's Salad.'

'I believe in the free enterprise system. I haven't paid for anything in the past 27 years...'

'The trouble with you doctors is that you don't really understand what the NHS is for.'

"One trip to the dentist and look who's got the attitude!"

"You have to get up early tomorrow, too? We have so much in common!"

"Are you V.A.T. registered..?"

'Sorry, I only drink still wines. I don't have the patience to wait for bubbles to pop.'

"Hey, Gary. Lois wanted to know if you’re up for waiting forever for reheated leftovers and sipping warm mimosas intended to ease the pain of poor service amid a cacophony of idiot tourists and 20-year-olds... you know, brunch."

"But how many followers do you have?"

'Sorry I can't pay your pension until I see gray hair. . . Oh yes, and you also get disability.'

"I hope that you're not refusing free dental care for ideological reasons."