Social Dynamics Explorers T-Shirts

'Look, we were really misled about how cool you were...Would you mind sitting at another table?'

You're wasting your time, you're just not that good looking, yeah well neither are you...

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

Is man a social animal? - 'As a married man, the short answer is no.'

"Ma'am, why don't you go ahead of me?" "Um... no thanks. Let's let this gentleman go ahead of us." "Oh, no... you ladies go right ahead!"

"Call me!"

"I'm not so sure I can handle this."

"It's from the children. They'd like us to let them in."

"God help us, it's that guy."

"I want to know why when I'm in a room people ignore me."

"He claims to be self aware but he clearly can't read a room."

Larry David

"Certainly. A party of four at seven-thirty in the name of Dr. Jennings. May I ask whether that is an actual medical degree or a Ph.D.?"

'Boy, look at his personal space!'

Poplar Trees/Not very Poplar Trees.

'Here's a list of women I want you to stay away from at the party tonight.'

Ask Sadie. Actual questions from actual readers! Send your questions to asksadie@rudypark.com. Dear Ask Sadie, My mom is always nagging me to clean my room. I don't see why I should have to. I like it the way it is. I don't nag at her for having a clean room, because I know that's how she likes it. How can I get her to just let me be me? - Unhappy at Home. Excellent question. The thing is, it's your mother's job to shape you into a respectable person. If you think "being you" includes being dirt

"I not only respect women, I look up to them."

"In the old days people with small dicks needed big cars. Today they write hate comments against Greta Thunberg."

"Ah guys, before you push any buttons can I just check my calculator?"

'Now that everybody can talk, I keep worrying about what people will say.'

Abstraction and recognition

"Let's not discuss it."

"Have you considered that your anger has something to do with the company you keep?"

'You're at that awkward age where the others have figured out that you're a drone and you don't do anything.'

"Do you think everyone hangs out with me because I'm cool and funny, or because I'm God."

Shy Man at Party

"Your morbid curiosity about the afterlife is scaring the children."

"Who invented Cinnamon-Raisin again?"

'So what if people are watching you. Aren't you also looking at them?'

"Oh, God, it's the Herefords, pretend we don't see them."

"My gut instinct was to say yes. . . but years in social work have shown me how these things end up working out."

'You know, sometimes I think we don't even speak the same body language.'

"Don't preted to hibernate when I'm talking to you."

"It seems that I cannot look them in the eye without prompting confrontation..." "What are you lookin' at?"