Social Club Goers Pillows

"Oh, how low can you get!"

Jazz quartet, piano, bass, sax and drums

"Anna - there's someone I'd like to meet."

'Mmm … and he's ringing wet too. I just can't resist the smell of a wet dog.'

"The next song is for all you unreconstructed commies, who are still in love with their tractors."

"Hey. We’re in the doghouse every night. That’s the beauty of it."

Caricatures of Political Figures Exhibited at the Opera Ball

Meeting at the Grumpy Old Men's Pub.

"Now don't let your concentration move from my hands and the cards. . ."

'I don't think they are playing with a full deck.'

"I'm not serving you mate - you're off yer face..!"

"Would you like to dance with me?"

"The first rule of musical chairs club is... you have to get out of your chairs!"

"Sorry guys, these are restricted premises: Show me your teeth so that I can check your age..."

Eccentric clothing may tend to interfere with play.

'Ok Fellas let's see some I.D.'

Her tears flowed like wine.

'And this one for handling tough questions from congress...'

Wordilly Durdillies - Rotery club

Oxford tour guides

Cricket Prospects.

'It's not for sale.'

"Dry sherry sir..?"

"Now, that's more LIKE it!"

At the flies' bar: 'When I was a young maggot, I dreamed of becoming an Airbus!'

"Tell him to fetch his own damn slippers."

Shingles Bar.

'I'm sorry, but I only dance with podiatrists.'

'Yeah? Well my personal trainer can beat up your personal trainer!'

"Stuffy in here, isn't it?"

"Another nice thing about a martini - it's gluten free."

"Sink or swim society - now...get busy!!"