Snack Whisperer T-Shirts

A fridge surrounded by books.

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

Honest Vending

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"Remember, you're only as old as your peel."

"Oh look—he fell asleep when you told me about your day."

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

"Tragic case of having the fridge from the TV when the World Cup is showing."

"My parents won't allow sugar in the house, so I've had to learn about it on the street."

"I like to use new Bible words. Let's beseech Mom for cookies."

'...And as suburban sprawl continues to grow, many people are finding themselves living uncomfortably close to their wildlife neighbors.'

Fishing rod coming out of a health farm towards a hot dog stand.

"Whoa! One last doughnut left."

Breakfast surreal.

"It feels like me against the world but it's actually just the state of Connecticut."

Student Food Pyramid

In prehistoric times, there were hunters, gatherers and guys who never had change.

"Billy, we don't need to feed that vacuum robot."

'Why, yes, I think that's a lovely sweater, Peter... But you know the rule: no snacks unless you brought enough for the whole class.'

Bill stumbles upon an automated taco maker.

"You complete me."

Romulus and Remus and the Vending Machine

'Beer? Wassat then?'

"You want me to explain how there were two doughnuts in the larder and now there is only one? Easy, it was too dark in there to see the second one."

Give me a child at seven and I will show you the MAN!

The Pope getting a Popsicle for Popes from the Freezer

Bakery. The smell of freshly baked bread is the only truly perfect man-made thing on earth.

Gym. Whatever weight I manage to lose here I always seem to find on my way home. Donuts.

"It's a map to the vending machines."

'Because it's there!'

Oysters in June - delicious!

NEXT EXIT Food & Drink Cafe...Open 24 hours: 'Hey! Here's the place we saw advertised on the freeway!'