Snack Minimalists Pillows

'It's called the 'Ask your boss for a raise' diet.'

LAY ZEE FUK

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

All Natural Nothing

Coming Soon! More Stuff You Could Live Without!

"I'm eating baklava through my balaclava!"

'Ed is a man of few words. And few letters.'

'Jim's blogging his thought for the day. He doesn't have any profound thoughts, he just has one thought per day.'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

'I think someone's asking to go out.'

'The doctor said my body is 40% fat. These cookies are only 20% fat. That's got to help.'

With one badly timed dunk teabreak was ruined.

"I just had a terrifying glimpse into our snack."

"It's a game changer. . . carrots and hummous batons but we've managed to make them out of sugar."

"No wonder he's so skinny - he eats like a bird."

'They use paper plates.'

"This sub tastes much better with some traffic jam."

Full Service ATM: "Do you want fries with that?"

Paranormal tips: sandwiches with crop circles may lead to marmalade stains on trousers

"In time you will come to see that Football is ballet with taco chips."

"Thanks for bringing the party mix, but. . ."

"My business plan? Well, all my friends are addicted, so if I can get access to potatoes and set up a deep fryer, I'll be rich!"

Pre Opera Dinners

Billy Bunter - Greyfriar's School 2007.

'The Nihilist Deli'

"Believe me, everyone at the bank envies our simple lifestyle."

Wordilly Durdillies - 'The Swedes that you can eat between meals...